Single During the Holidays

Happy Monday Queens!

I hope you’re off to a wonderful start to your week. It’s been on my heart to talk about being single during the holidays because not only can I relate, but it’s also been a struggle for me this year if I can keep it real.

The holidays automatically make me think of family and love. It makes me feel all warm and mushy inside. I picture myself curled up with a glass of hot cocoa or egg nog watching holiday movies with my hunk of a man, while the fireplace keeps the house cozy.  But every time that image crosses my mind, I am then brought back to reality. That’s not my reality. At least not right now. A tough pill to swallow because I just knew I would be married by age 22. Tuh. I know God still laughs at me for that thought.

For me, each year seems to get a little harder. 2014 was by far the worst year of my life, so during the holidays I wasn’t even thinking about being in a relationship. At that point, I hated men. 2015 I was pretty content. I was rebuilding my relationship with God and repairing my heart. 2016 was an awesome holiday season because it was the first that I had the opportunity to host Thanksgiving at my place. I desired a partner, but the urge wasn’t super strong. But this year? Oh. My. Lord. My desire for a spouse has grown tremendously. It’s like everyday I daydream about trimming the Christmas tree, kissing under the mistletoe, and getting snowed in with that special somebody. WHAT IN THE WORLD IS WRONG WITH ME?! Why do I feel this way? I guess it’s because I look at my friends, family and peers and they’re experiencing this season with someone else and I’m all alone wishing I could just get a warm embrace from a man LOL.

I’ve got this single life down packed so I can totally relate if you’re feeling a little down during the holidays. It’s definitely a struggle because I desire to be a wife and mother. Of course I know I can’t rush God’s timing and I don’t want to. It’s just difficult and this time of year has gotten me for sure. I always try to put things into perspective and shift the focus though to help me get through it. I reflect on how I was blessed enough to see another year in good health. That for me is enough and outweighs any amount of loneliness that might creep in. I have also accomplished so much this year. I’ve written an e-Book, created a web series, spoke at events, and much more. I am truly blessed. I have a place to live, food to eat, wonderful friends and family, and most importantly I have a God that loves me and never gives up on me.

If you’re struggling this year, think about what you DO have. That spouse will come when it’s the right time honey! And you can add him to your list of what you DO have in the future. I found this clip of Tamera Mowry Housely talking about being single during the holidays, and it encouraged me. I hope it encourages you as well!

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