Take Care of Me…

Hello Ladies and Gentlemen,

It’s been a long time I shouldn’t have left you, left you  without a dope beat to step to, step to…corny I know! But I pray you are all well.

First, let me apologize for my absence, when life happened it happened.

It’s funny how we can constantly tell others that it’s okay and things will be better but never truly believe those words until something happens to us… Let me explain.

December 2016 ended with a devastating loss for me. My family tried to encourage me and I was trying to convince myself that “yes I’m okay!” without actually dealing with my feelings. This, my friends was not a good idea at all!

I was trying to stay strong in my faith but to be quite honest I struggled. It was hard for me to encourage anybody when I wasn’t encouraged, I wasn’t happy, and I wasn’t positive. I was embarrassed, I was sad, and I was angry. I had nothing to give anybody because I had nothing to give myself. I felt like I had let myself down.

I still had obligations and other commitments, and I felt bad that I couldn’t do or give my best.  But, that’s when my mother reminded me, it is okay to take time to take care of yourself. Taking care of your self is essential for YOU and those around you!

Here are a few steps that helped me during my low moment:

 1. Speak the Word!

The word of God is alive and living. When you read and speak God’s promises over yourself it’s like a seed that is planted, watered, and grows. The fruit of those seeds are His peace, His joy, His strength, His love and so much more.

2. Misery loves company, but you shouldn’t!

Watch who you surround yourself with during this time, this can make all the difference in the world. They can either keep you down or lift you up. Positive vibes only remember that!!

3. Just do it!

Research has shown that exercise or any other physical activity aids in decreasing depression. So get out there!  Zumba, yoga, weight training, whatever it is,  get moving and release those feel-good brain chemicals!

4. Don’t be so hard!

Do not be so hard on yourself. Life happens but don’t allow it to break you. Work through what you are feeling, allow your self to be sad, and angry but then pick yourself back up. You may be down for the count but don’t be counted out!

 

So until next time, take care of yourself and don’t feel guilty! You deserve your best SELF!!

Lady J.

Adulting 101

Hey Ladies!

It’s almost the weekend, so I’m super pumped! But let’s talk about the elephant in the room of every millennial… ADULTING. *cue dramatic music* Who knew being an adult could be so challenging?  I surely didn’t. I mean yeah, I knew it wasn’t going to be a cakewalk, but I swear I go through about 100 emotions a day. I know many of you can relate. It’s like you go from being swaddled in a warm, comfortable blanket to being thrown into a pack of wolves. It’s just TEW much at times.

I think my major issues with Adulting are time management and finances. I don’t necessarily struggle with procrastination or anything like that, but most times I have so much on my plate that my head feels like it’s spinning around in circles. I often find myself choosing between two things I really need or want to do. On a normal day I’m choosing between a nap or a workout; and on an extremely busy day I’m out of the house for 12 plus hours. Sometimes I wish I could push a pause button on life, but of course that’s not an option.

Finances, oh finances YOU are the main culprit of adult stress. Money is needed for basically everything you could even think of. Want to move out? You need money. Want to start a business? You need money. Want to take a girls trip? YOU NEED MONEY! Can we catch a break? Geez. It’s quite frustrating especially when you begin to think about the future. I have a desire to get married and have kids like many millennials, but I’d rather not bring children in the world until I’m prepared financially. I’m already thinking about how I’m going to send them to college and I don’t even have a potential husband. It’s madness!

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Your twenties present so many shifts and changes. Most people graduate from college and the next day they’re left to figure out everything on their own. Once you kind of have adulting down, curveballs start to come your way. I’m just ducking and dodging as I go. Thank God I have amazing parents who are there to help if I really need it. But once you leave the nest, it’s so hard to put pride aside and ask for help. I moved out, so I should figure it out without them now. Right? Eh. Not necessarily. But that’s easier said than done.

Along with the external factors of adulting, there’s an internal struggle that also happens. You’re trying to decipher exactly who you are as a woman.  Tons of questions swarm your mind daily like…What kind of woman do I want to be? What will/won’t I accept from people? Do I want to get married and have children? Finding yourself and your true identity can be tricky especially if you have distractions in your life. I had to get rid of mine to start working on the inside. I’ll elaborate in another post.

Adulting can be tough, but here’s how I’m managing to make it. Maybe this could help you too.

  1. Live in the moment. The power of NOW is truly a force to be reckoned with. You don’t know what tomorrow holds or if you’ll even be alive tomorrow, so live in the moment and enjoy the time you have here on earth.
  2. Realize that you don’t have to have it all together. A lot of times I’m a wreck and accepting that has made adulting much easier. You won’t always have it together and you won’t always have the answers, but that’s OK. Humanize yourself.
  3. Stop comparing yourself to others. Now this is the toughest thing you could probably do because social media has stolen the joy of uniqueness. Everyone wants to be the same and have the same journey. Enjoy YOUR journey. All the bumps in the road, the tears, the pain will all be worth it.
  4. Make time for yourself (recoup). It’s important that you’re not on go-mode 24-7. I usually like to take a day to just pamper myself by getting some rest, curling up with a good book, taking a bubble bath, or treating myself to something special.
  5. Plan. Even though our plans often fail, it’s important to write down your goals and plans for the future. If you want to purchase a home or a car, plan out how you will save your money to make those purchases. I have personally made a plan that by age 30, I won’t be working a 9 to 5 job. I will be working for myself full-time.

 

You got this!! Come through adult!

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Sync…

Hello Ladies and Gentlemen,

I know it has been a long time! But we will talk about that another time: I just finished my quiet time and I had to share with you all.

So you are probably wondering what I mean by quiet time, well allow me to elaborate. Every morning I try (keyword: TRY) to spend time reading my Bible, and communing with God – my heavenly Father, through prayer.

I always start my prayer by thanking Him for who He is and how wonderful He is. Then I proceed to ask Him for things like keeping my family and me safe, among other things. Afterwards, I thank Him for answered prayers, seal it with an amen and go on with my day.

However, there are moments through out my day, when I feel the urge to pray.  An urge that lingers on and on. At times to me “the moment” doesn’t seem ideal or I already prayed this morning so why am I feeling this way?

This morning what I realized is that, our relationship with Christ can not be one-sided. When YOU are ready to pray, when YOU need something, when YOU need him. God loves to commune with us outside “our needs.” He longs to know our thoughts, even though He knows them already, He longs to know our hearts desires, even though He places them there. He longs to take us deeper in Him.

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So I ask: Are you in sync with God? Do you hear Him when He speaks, when He calls, when He beckons?  Stop missing God’s calls because you never know how and when that moment with Him will change your day, week, month or even your entire life! He knows all that we need, even before we ask Him. I am realizing more and more that when God shows up for one thing, He feels you up with everything!

When you are in sync, God prepares you for situations ahead. I promise you “that moment” makes all the difference in the world when you are faced with a situation.

Stay in sync because prayer changes things!

Until next time,

Lady J.